Seitan (Say-tahn) (Satan?) "wheat meat"

Facts:
Made from gluten, the insoluble protein in wheat.
Called seitan in Japen, Kofu in China - eaten in China, Japan, Korea, Russia, Middle East for thousands of years.
3.5 oz. of seitan has 118 calories, 18% protein, less than 1% unsaturated fat.
3.5 oz of beef has 207 calories and 32.2% protein, high in saturated fats.
Seitan is an incomplete protein and needs a supplement of dairy or legumes (peas,beans).
Basic Seitan
2 cups Vital Wheat Gluten (such as Bob's Red Mill)
1/2 tsp sage
1 tsp. marjoram
1 tsp. onion powder
1 tsp. garlic powder
2 cups water

Broth (to simmer the seitan in)
6 cups water (with vegetable granules if you like).
2 Tbsp. molasses - if you want darker seitan as in "beef" (skip this if you want a lighter seitan such as "chicken").
2 Tbsp. Soy Sauce (Worchestershire or Braggs amino acids)

Mix the gluten, flour and spices.
Add water and quickly stir into a sponge-like dough.
Knead the dough about 15 times.
Let rest 15 minutes (while you get the broth simmering)
Slice into cutlets (1/2 inch slabs).
Mix the ingredients for the broth and bring to a boil.
Add the seitan slices and simmer them, covered, in broth for about 1 hr.
They will EXPAND to almost twice their size, puff up, and float to the top (and darn near try to get out of the pot, if you let it).

Drain the seitan and use for any recipe that calls for "meat".

The REAL story:
When I first added the water to the gluten, it immediately, and I do mean immediately, turned into a rubbery glob that looked like a giant brain. You really can't knead the stuff, so I slapped it around on the bread board for less than a minute which works quite well.

Not knowing what I was doing, I tried cutting the seitan into 2"x2" cubes. After they simmered and were a dark brown, I turned the resultant project over to Kristen (I can't eat wheat, so I'm out on this one).

Kristen's Comments:First impression: they kind of looked like a container of doggy doos. (O.k., "think beef, think beef".)
Dehydrating for jerky:
I sliced them thin and then soaked them in soy sauce and hot sauce; then dehydrated them for a few hours. turned out o.k. but kinda chewy and should have soaked longer. They would have been better if I had put soy sauce and brown sugar on them. I took them out of the dehydrator when they were still slightly soft. The ones that were completely dry were too hard to eat. IMPOSSIBLE! The dogs liked them though.
Baked:
I left them in whole chunks, sprayed the pan and the seitan blobs with spray oil, seasoned them with salt, pepper, and garlic powder and baked them at 350 for roughly 30 minutes. They were crispy and delightful...I was shocked! I think I should have cut them into stew meat size, but they were very good. My husband even ate some and he liked them a lot, so I think we have something here. Baked and seasoned. Yummmmmm.

At this point, I made another batch and used the vegetable broth to make the seitan not so dark brown. I ground up 1/2 pound of it in my Universal meat grinder (the old steel one, hand cranked) using the medium blade. Then I put the ground seitan into a frying pan brushed with a little oil and browned the seitan. I had a package of taco seasoning in the cupboard, so I just followed the directions on the package which was 1/2 package of taco seasoning and some water, simmer for 10 min. Huh! This stuff is pretty darn good.

Kristen's Comments:I have to tell you...the taco meat is AWESOME!!!! I ate some last night and now some for lunch today. I am hooked. I want to eat it everyday. After driving home from Iowa the other night, I just had to make myself 2 softshell tacos. The kids love it and so far, this is the best creation yet. I can't say enough about it. If you could sell it, you would have a million dollars. Love being the guinea pig - oink, oink.

Burgers:
I ground up most of the lighter colored seitan and made 4 burgers out of 1/2 pound. The recipe I used called for a lot of ingredients such as finely ground peppers, mushrooms, onions, and garlic as well as spices such as oregano, thyme, celery seed, dry mustard, ground ginger. Too much stuff. The result was very much like a "veggie burger" which I never really liked. The key to burgers is to add some beef rub spice or Mrs. Dash, mushrooms or peppers or cheese but go easy on the spices and too many vegetables. You only want enough vegetables mixed in to add some moisture to the burger. Then add 1/4 C. whole wheat flour and 2 Tbsp. cornmeal to bind it together. To make the patty, press some seitan into a 1/3 measuring cup, dump it out in your hand, and press it flat a little. Works great.

Kristen's Comments:I had my husband put the burgers on the grill - well, sometimes he doesn't watch too closely and when I put one of the burgers on a bun and bit into it, we heard a loud crack - "Oh, no - you didn't break a tooth, did you?" Um. Well, no, but the outside of the burger was a lot overdone and was inedible since it was so hard you couldn't bite it. The inside was great, except, yes, this particular recipe does taste a lot like a veggie burger (which I happen to like). Brush the surfaces of the burger with a little olive oil to prevent drying out. And don't cook the seitan over 3 minutes total. It's already cooked, so you just want to get some smoky flavor and warm it up. Don't try nuking them - I did one and it was terrible.

Fried chicken:
The last light cutlet was about 1/2" thick, so I dipped it in flour, then beaten egg, and then bread crumbs and fried it in a little butter until it was golden brown on both sides.

Kristen's Comments:The "chicken" cutlet was uncannily like chicken. It was very good. I nuked it for 35 seconds to warm it up and put some sweet and spicy BBQ sauce on it. This would be excellent on a bun.

Pricewise, seitan works out to about $1.40 a lb. Not bad. Kristen has a couple more pounds of ground seitan to work with, so we will hear later how the meatballs, casserole, or meatloaf turn out. Stay tuned.